Now your managers/leaders never actually “say” your friends and family are losers, but they allude to it all the time. This message of “only hang with winners,” although given with the best of intentions – is potentially dangerous. One reason why, may be the “leader” you’re actually hearing this from. If you were recruited by someone who is brand new in the business, how can they tell you what works or what doesn’t if they don’t have any real world experience yet? On the other hand, if you were recruited by someone who has been in the business for several years, and is still struggling – what makes this person an authority? In both cases, were there actually any “winners” involved?
Let’s make one thing very clear, a winner is NOT someone who decides to join a direct sales company, reads self-help books by the dozens or even starts their own part-time business – a winner is a person who actually wins. What a concept! They make big money, they have big teams and they live what they teach. You’ll find that winners really “do” hang with other winners most of the time – they invest their time with people who get results. They do not spend time with the guy or gal who has been schlepping to hotel meetings for the last seven years with one person on their team. The winners in your company are usually spending time with people who are building the biggest teams and earning some serious money.
If you have access to people like this on a daily basis, then the message, “only hang with winners,” starts making a whole lot more sense – why spend time with anyone else, when you have someone with a success-consciousness, willing to tell you how to think and act, to get the same results they do? Hanging out with your broke friends, when you can be spending time with successful people, in my opinion, is stupid – plain and simple.
However, like Anthony Robbins always says, “Love your family, but choose your peer group.” Really good friends are like family anyway, so I would add those people to your family list as well. These people were a part of your life before this opportunity came along. They may not share your ambition or even have dreams like you, but they love you and, in most cases, want to see you do well. Like everything in life, there are some exceptions – if you have someone who is cynical 24/7 and is always telling you that you have no shot at doing anything special in your life, would you want to spend time with this person? I know I wouldn’t!
When you’re first getting started, and even when you start making some splashes in your business – remember to stay grounded by sharing time with the people that love you the most and like you for who you are. I know that if I were to do it all over again, I would not have alienated so many close personal relationships, just to spend time with people I “thought” were winners. If you’re going to take away time from your friends and family, make sure you do it with the winners in your organization, not people you “think” you’re supposed to spend time with.
